|pretty pills from here|
As it turns out, a lot of my drive to talk/blog/write has been driven by my anxiety.
And I know this because it's disappeared a lot lately. An increase in my daily dose has had a marked effect on my 'need' to blog. And also my 'want' to blog.
I can't decided whether I can't be bothered. I'm too tired. I don't care. Or I just don't have as much to say.
Whatever the reason, the upshot is I have found it very difficult to even open my own blog - and nigh on impossible to read anyone else's. Which is very strange for me.
I'm hoping it is just a settling in period, and I'll adjust to the increase - because I really love to write. But not just to hear my own voice. And if I were to write at the moment that's what it would feel like. I want to write because I am fired up about something. Because there is something burning inside me that I have to share. I don't want to talk just to fill the silence.
So I guess this is a little explanation of where I have been lately. I'm still here, muddling along. With my good days and bad days and everything in between. I'm just not quite myself.
Not that I want to stop taking the meds. I'll take lazy over terrified and starving any day of the week...